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Geoige Pupa

Son of the Big, Bad Pizza

By Geoige Pupa

 

 

Long ago and far away, in the Land of Stupid, lived a young pizza who was only an acquaintance of his father. His father was the most evil thing in all the Land of Stupid, until he was destroyed by a pickle and a mushroom.

When this young pizza, known as Junior Pizza, heard about what had happened to his dad, he said to himself, “Welp, I reckon I ought to be mean to the pickle and the mushroom too.” So he searched all over the land for them, and then he found them. His theory was that it would be neat to take them on a voyage and hinder them in a terrible, violent, miserable, hideous concentration camp. His concentration had been broken, however, upon seeing the pickle skipping along with his comrade the mushroom.

Junior went up to them, pretending to be a poor beggar who needed a home. The pickle and the mushroom told him to live with them. When they got to the pickle and Mushroom’s house, Junior Pizza revealed his true identity, though little did he know that the mushroom’s homicidal, artistic cousin Le Toadstool was staying over for the weekend.

With great agility, Le Toadstool was able to hoist Junior Pizza up into a blender and chop him up. After a while, the pickle, the mushroom, and Le Toadstool tried adjoining Junior Pizza’s guts with a health-shake mix in the blender. Then they drank it, and they lived healthier ever after—even when a multitude of bad diseases hit the Land of Stupid. Of course, the pickle, the mushroom, and Le Toadstool were so healthy that the diseases died as soon as they got there. And so the pickle, the mushroom, and Le Toadstool lived strangely ever after.

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