Not long ago and not far away, in a big city, Teddy Pig
and Beaver were flying through the city on their way home, after a long day of crime fighting. When they got home, they ate
dinner with Penny and the six piglets. All of the piglets were usually restless and caused trouble, but for some reason they
were all calm and quiet tonight.
Teddy asked Penny what was going on.
Penny didn’t know. Then Teddy Jr. spoke up and said, “Oh, I was sick of my scum-eating brothers and sisters jumping
all over the food and getting us all sent to bed every night. So tonight I tied them all to their chairs and Super Glued their
mouths shut. What do you expect? I’m only two-and-a-half years old!”
Teddy Pig smiled at his son. “That’s
a good boy! Someday you’ll be a great super hero like your old man!”
Teddy Jr. rejected the idea. “No!
No way, Dad! I wanna be a writer for perfume commercials! I’ve got one written already. Listen!” He pulled out
a piece of paper and read aloud. “Would you still love me if I were a toad?
“Maybe, if only I could be your
“Speak to me! Shut up! Die!
Live! Ah, the stupidity of it!
“So, what do you think?”
Teddy Pig got a disturbed look on
his face. He told Teddy Jr. to untie and unglue his brothers and sisters. Then, after that was done, he sent the six piglets
to bed. Penny then punched him in the face for encouraging Teddy Jr.’s behavior.
Later that night, Teddy and Penny
were awakened by their dog barking and yipping. Penny went into the kitchen to see what was going on. She was shocked to find
Beaver holding an ax over the poor, fat, doggy. She screamed. Beaver then turned around, with blood-red eyes, and threw the
ax at her. Fortunately, he missed.
Teddy ran out to see what the problem
was. Penny told him, “That overgrown sewer rat tried to kill me! Now either you get rid of him, or I’m leaving!”
Teddy whined, “But, Dear, I’m
sure there’s a perfectly good reason that Beaver threw his ax at you! Maybe there was a fly on your nose.”
After he said that, Penny yelled,
“Come on, kids! We’re going on a trip!” Then Teddy sadly watched his wife walk out the door, followed by
five piglets. Teddy turned to Beaver, whose eyes had returned to normal, and asked him what was wrong.
Beaver said, “I don’t
know; I don’t even remember throwing the ax! I don’t even remember getting out of bed! I don’t feel so good.”
Then his eyes turned red, and his
voice changed. “Hi there, Teddy! Ha ha! Aw, what’s wrong; did your wife leave you? Well, don’t worry. Ha
ha! King Crunchnmunch is back to take care of you! Ha ha ha!”
“But King Crunchnmunch is dead,
Beaver…Oh no! Get out of my side-kick’s body, bozo!”
“Well, I can’t say it’s
nice to see you either, but that’s why I’m here! I want revenge! Oh, but don’t worry, I’ll be finished
with your faithful side-kick’s body real soon! Ha ha ha ha ha!” Then, in Beaver’s body, King Crunchnmunch
flew out the window and into the night.
Teddy Jr. ran down the stairs and
into the kitchen to get some food. Teddy Pig looked down and saw him. “Aren’t you supposed to be in bed!? No!
Aren’t you supposed to be with your mother!?”
“Yeah, but I was in the bathroom
when everyone left.”
“Well then, I’ll have
to take you with me.” So the two of them went to find Beaver, leaving their dog behind to guard the house.
It was early the next morning before they found Beaver’s
body lifelessly lying in the very alley where Teddy had met him two-and-a-half years before. Teddy Jr. splashed water on him
to wake him up. Then Teddy Pig, Sr. checked his side-kick’s eye color. They were normal.
Beaver was hysterical. “Help,
Teddy! Help! He’s in the junk yard! But, well, not anymore! But he used my hands to build a mechanical body for himself!!
And he went to the hotel where Penny and the piglets are!”
Teddy picked up his son and Beaver
and flew to a hospital. There, he left Beaver with some doctors and then flew to the hotel. When he got there, he told Teddy
Jr. to wait in the lobby. Then he found out from the desk clerk that a big, robot cookie had taken the family to the roof.
Teddy flew to the roof, where he saw
his family hanging on a flag pole, and the evil, alien cookie laughing. The king noticed Teddy and knocked him out. Then Teddy
Jr. flew up and threw King Crunchnmunch all the way back to his home planet. Then he saved his family, and they all went home.
A few weeks later, Beaver came home,
and everyone was happy. They threw a party and lived like pigs ever after.