Long ago and far away, in the Land of Stupid,
the pickle and the mushroom were running around in the forest. They took off all their clothes, because it was Nude Day in
the Land of Stupid. Everything was the
same, except that no one wore any clothes.
While they were running, they bumped
into an active electric fence. They got all tangled up, and it started to fry them. Then a pretzel jumped out of a tree and
said, “Hi, I’m Captain Pretzel. Can I give you some advice?”
They said, “Sure!”
Captain Pretzel said, “Get untangled.”
They did. Captain Pretzel sent them to a corner for two hours as punishment for almost frying to death. Then he put them in
a fire engine and took them to the hospital.
The doctor who helped them was inside
of a fruit cake looking at pictures of Nurse Tomato. Then he came out to look at the pickle and the mushroom. He said, “Hi,
I’m Doctor Carrot! People say I’m an expert, but that’s a lie. People say I’m not sincere about my
work; well, I’ve never lost a patient. I know where each and every one is buried! So where’s the victim?”
The pickle and the mushroom raised
their hands. Dr. Carrot told them that he didn’t support vegetable rights. Then he asked them if they had a coin. The
pickle handed him a quarter. Dr. Carrot said, “Heads: we do surgery; tales: we let you live.”
At that moment, Nurse Tomato walked
in. Dr. Carrot cut her in half with a buzz-saw and ate out all her guts. He said, “Well, I had to have one victim today;
I’m a vampire carrot.” The pickle, the mushroom, and Captain Pretzel looked at each other and ran away.
The pickle and the mushroom eventually
recovered from the electrocution, and they lived strangely ever after.